January 18, 2010
the thing of it is
My husband's grandmother was the first person I ever heard say "the thing of it is." The expression sounded to me like almost-something but not-quite-something, kind of like "for all intensive purposes" or "mute point." If my husband's grandmother had not been such a nice person, I might have tossed that expression right into the unedumacated bin.
Yesterday my bandmate's mom said to me - totally out of the blue - "You know, you get prettier every year." I almost fell down. That was the last thing I ever expected anyone to say to me.
The thing of it is, I have never been what anyone would call pretty. I remember, as a teenager, my father observing "well, you've never been any great beauty, but...[insert something about getting by in life on brains alone]." Men have never chased after me. People who are attracted to attractive people are not immediately attracted to me, and if they don't get close enough to notice my sparkling personality, forget it. When I feel extra-special-charitable toward myself, I'll sometimes allow that I am "interesting looking." But never pretty, not ever. And, shallow as it sounds, I have always wished otherwise.
You won't see any old photos of me on Facebook.
Recently another friend and I were talking about how some people grow into their features as they age. Maybe - miracle of miracles - this could happen with me, and I will end up somewhat more attractive in middle age.
Kay, you will probably never read this, but thank you.
Posted by joe positive at January 18, 2010 7:50 PM
TrackBack URL for this entry:
Hi! You have very inspiring blog. I enjoy every post in it! Thank you! :)
Posted by: Linda at January 19, 2010 1:18 AM
for all intents and purposes.... :)
Posted by: Tina at January 19, 2010 2:58 PM
@tina: exactly :-)
Posted by: joe positive at January 19, 2010 6:20 PM
It's true. Some people do get prettier (or grow into their features) as they age.
You should thank her in person -- or tweet her ;)
Posted by: Ewen at January 19, 2010 11:55 PM
A hira zukuri-stopping kind-of analysis.
Ever-so-grateful, for your as-innate-as-unconscious sense of Altruism.
Posted by: corradogiambalvo at January 20, 2010 4:51 PM
Shame on your dad for not telling you every chance he got that you were his beautiful little girl.
Posted by: Ray at January 24, 2010 6:32 PM
Hey Joe - I learned the truth at 17. And then I learned another truth at 47.
Any way, I really just stopped by here to leave you a message (I don't have your email address and I am no longer on fb/twitter).
You probably are aware of this record but just in case you are not: http://www.mergerecords.com/stroke/
I thought of you when I saw the Tall Dwarfs track.
Posted by: tim at February 5, 2010 1:04 PM
I did know about Stroke. I've been trying to follow Chris Knox's progress ever since he had the stroke.
You can always find me on chrunners.
Posted by: joe positive at February 5, 2010 6:58 PM