September 7, 2005
really gotta not bail
Today I got a blessed comp day to make up for the 18 hours I worked over the weekend, so my husband and I decided to have a track date. We drove to one of the few public tracks around - actually a middleschool track that hosts little footballers and cheerleaders on weekday afternoons, but we were early enough that the track was empty and ours. I was supposed to run 6x1000 at "5K pace," which is not the pace of any 5K I've ever actually run, but the 5K pace my husband really thinks I could run, if the planets all lined up properly and all the gods decided to smile at one time. I ran the first item well within myself (I thought), and it was a few seconds fast. The next two felt progressively harder, and I decided I'd stop for water and stuff after 3 items. Item 4 was 2s slow, and the fifth was a second fast, and at that point I was cooked. I declared to my husband that I was done, stalked around the track trying to catch my breath enough to get a sip of water, started to feel better, started to feel guilty. My husband - bless him 1000 times - suggested I run a 600, so I did, with hurting quads but 6s faster than I should have. At the end it all, here's how it stacked up: my goal was 6x1000 @ 3:56 avg. I actually ran 5x1000 @ 3:55 avg, then 1x600 @ 2:14.
I'm glad I did this, and glad it's over, but I still worry about this tendency to get almost all the way through something, or almost to some goal that will make me very happy, and then allow myself to bail. I gotta not bail, really gotta not bail.
Posted by joe positive at September 7, 2005 7:03 PM
You work so hard. Don't beat up up yourself so badly. You have what it takes.
Posted by: Dawn at September 7, 2005 8:14 PM
Yo Joe, Hang in there. I feel your pain and want of a good three fingers of bourbon, I'm traing for the Marine corps Marathon next month and I'm struggling!! JD
Posted by: JD at September 13, 2005 8:02 PM