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September 10, 2004

Fessing up

I actually have a race tomorrow, too. But it's not nearly as "serious" as Blondie's or Beth's. It's a four-person relay that should be a lot of fun. I'm running with Andy and our friends Shannon and Paul - we were all a team last year, and a somewhat sorry one at that. Shannon still hadn't quite gotten back into shape after having had her first kid, Andy and Paul just really hadn't been running much, and I was running on an undiagnosed but very much present metatarsal stress fracture. So my goal (*ahem* I mean, our goal) is to just do better than last year! I've been riding everyone's butt about this since July; I hope they're ready!

I don't have a whole lot of expectation for my performance tomorrow, especially since I'm nearing the end of a big week. I think we all feel the same - Shannon's been warning me of groin problems, Paul's been warning me of Achilles problems, Andy's just been his regular noncommittal self, and I've got this "high-mileage" excuse, but none of us wants to make an ass of himself/herself! So keep your fingers crossed for us.

BUT ... realistically, nobody's really going to be paying us much attention. I think some of the more serious training groups, like Gilbert's, have worked to put some good teams together. In fact, the only women's team I know of is pretty kick-ass; I doubt anyone will be able to come near them. Why didn't they try to "share the love" and put together some teams to get some real competition?

As I was reading Beth's blog tonight and her comment about being shy about sharing her goals, I started thinking about how many people I know - especially women - who regularly understate their goals for races. I think it's because we've placed such a high premium on "humility" that it makes us reluctant to really say what we'd like to do. It's the same pressure that makes us play down our accomplishments when we achieve them. I must say that I generally don't subscribe to the "humility" line of thinking, although most of the time I feel *really* self-conscious about sharing my goals or accomplishments. When people ask what my goals are for a race, I'll give a straightforward answer as to what I think can do. And when I've run a great race I don't do much to hide my excitement. And in both cases I worry that people think I'm full of myself. But in both cases I think that false humility is a worse option. (Plus, by now, most of my friends would be able to smell the insincerity a mile a way!)

That being said, I honestly don't have a whole lot of expectation for tomorrow. (Well - I'd *better* do better than I did with a stress fracture!) I'm saving the expectations for January and February!

Whew! Forgive the rambling. It's the margarita I had with dinner (you'd think I'da had enough of those last week!)

Posted by jenandmats at September 10, 2004 8:59 PM